I was maid for loving you
by Wouter Jaegers
Summary: At the eve of the most important day in her life, Tomoyo comes to terms concerning her feelings for Sakura


I WAS MAID FOR LOVING YOU. 

A Card Captor Sakura fanfic by Wouter Jaegers

The Daidouji household still was situated the place where Tomoyo grew up, she guessed that aside from being her childhood home it was also the foundation of what kind of person she eventually would become. Mother always had female guards around who were with her regardless of what she did or where she went. Tomoyo wondered if they were the reason why she took a liking to the female gender. It was no choice she made it was just there and those sleek yet muscular bodies of her bodyguards made her look up to them, admire them and eventually she began fantasizing about them. 

But no matter how many of those babes were around, she knew that none of them would be able to give her what she craved, friendship. That changed when meeting Sakura. Tomoyo smiled warmly when thinking back at that day. She knew that she had a liking for girls but on that particular day it became even more apparent. Sakura was the kind of girl who gets better looking as she matures and even at ten she was of an astonishing beauty. Tomoyo had found the soul mate she had been searching for, or at least that's what she initially thought.

Sakura had it all, looks, brains, magical abilities and a lovable persona but one thing she didn't have was a liking towards girls. Tomoyo found out very early that she had no chance of making Sakura her lover; Sakura would love to tell stories about Yukito and how handsome he was. And then came Syaoran Li, the boy from China who never granted Sakura anything but there was something in his way of doing in which Tomoyo recognized herself. Although their methods were different, they were both out for Sakura's love. 

Syaoran turned out to be a nice person after all, who just never had the opportunity to express himself the way he wanted. Tomoyo knew exactly where he was coming from. She could express herself by tailoring Sakura's clothes and video taping all her actions. Syaoran never had such an outlet and thus came across blunt and unfriendly. Towards Sakura his normal way of doing would be degrading putting her value as a card captor in doubt but even then, there was something in his eyes, something very lonely.

Tomoyo put in one of her many videotapes and watched. Here were Sakura and Syaoran, almost a year after he came over from Hong Kong, fighting side by side. As Syaoran's face came into view she stopped the tape. His eyes looked full of life, the emptiness of when he first came around was gone. Syaoran and Sakura eventually started dating.

As Tomoyo laid out a spread of pictures of Sakura from her tenth to her twenty-fifth she flushed. Sakura became a very beautiful woman, her athletic figure and childish face combining both things that Tomoyo would like to have in a lover. At eighteen Tomoyo went to England to study, while there she began dating girls, trying to make herself familiar with having a lesbian relationship, it struck her that it didn't feel awkward.  It once again proved that being a lesbian was no deliberate choice it was something that had been there all along.

But none of the girls she dated during her time in England were out for a serious relationship; most of them were in it for the sex of it. It pained Tomoyo to see someone she had been with making out with a guy the very next day. Although she had learned a lot during her stay, she knew that she wouldn't find her true love in England.

At her return to Japan, many of her old friends were there to throw her a welcome party. It was at this party where she heard of the day she both feared and longed for to see. Sakura and Syaoran announced their wedding. Tomoyo was in tears both of happiness for Sakura and of sadness that this very last chance of having her as her lover, even if it were for just one night, was gone. Tomoyo smiled as she watched the tape of the announcement. Sakura was happy, that was important, even as a child Tomoyo vowed to make Sakura happy, mission accomplished.

Being Maid of honor was by far the hardest thing Tomoyo remembered doing. But as Sakura's best friend it simply was her duty to be there. Tomoyo's seemingly endless supply of money paid for the bills of a very beautiful and very big wedding. Sakura was overjoyed and gave her a very big smooch on her cheek; the only time she had the honor of feeling just how soft Sakura's lips were. Rather than taking this as a slap in the face of being pressed upon of what she never would have, Tomoyo saw it as a blessing, a blessing of being a granted a taste of the forbidden fruit and it was offered by Sakura herself no less.

As Tomoyo watched the tape of the wedding she almost laughed out loud when seeing Syaoran and his best man Takashi awaiting Sakura's arrival at the altar. She couldn't make out what Takashi was talking about but it was no doubt something about where the term "Best man" came from or how people in Hawaii would arrange a marriage by filling coconut shells with sand and throw them in the ocean seeing which one would stay afloat the longest. Takashi and Chiharu were an engaged couple but she hadn't found a way to make him stop making up all those non-sense.

Sakura still looked stunning in the wedding dress that Tomoyo had tailored for her. Rather than using white satin Tomoyo went for oker pink, a very warm color. She tried to make Sakura's personality to come forward and succeeded in doing so. Syaoran nearly fainted when Sakura and her father came walking up the isle.

The wedding was a bittersweet affair for Tomoyo, she was happy for her friend but sad of never being granted a chance but that was to change. At the wedding party she met up with a person who probably was the very last person she expected to attend the wedding.

Meilin Li had been there all along, blending in with the background, trying not to attract much attention and looking very out of place. Maybe it was just that why Tomoyo walked up to her and greeted her. When Meilin looked up she revealed an empty smile, her eyes were empty. 

Was it mutual kinship; was it the craving for a friend, or maybe a Clow card? Tomoyo wasn't sure but there was no denying that there was something that made the two of them start a conversation. Both of them walked out onto a balcony of the mansion where the wedding took place and Meilin cleaned out her closet, she had been Syaoran's designated wife, it had been arranged in their childhood and he never seemed to even like her. Although she made peace with the fact that she would never have Syaoran, this wedding just slapped it in her face.

Their conversation lasted longer than it should have and they both started spending time together after the wedding. Lunch meetings, tai-chi classes, shopping sprees all sorts of silly things, they even visited each other for no apparent reason. But this was no ordinary friendship; Tomoyo began to notice the signs of something beautiful when Meilin began to walk closer to her at every time they met. And it was at an empty metro station after they missed the last train home that it happened.

A kiss of true love; Tomoyo would never forget it, the kisses she had from the girls she dated before were just dust in the wind, this was different. Losing the ones they set their eyes on had brought Tomoyo and Meilin together. Their mutual kinship had made the magic happen.

As Tomoyo closed the closet containing the videos and photographs of Sakura, she glanced at the wedding picture, she was the maid of honor at her love interrest' wedding but harbored no regrets about that matter. Sakura was happy with Syaoran, who was she to make her unhappy, she never would admit her crush to Sakura and she had no reason to do so either, what you don't know can't hurt you.

Meilin was peacefully asleep in the master bed, Tomoyo gently stroke her long black hair before joining her, tomorrow would be a busy day it was time that she would get some rest too. Before turning off the lights Tomoyo took a glance at the wedding dress she would wear tomorrow, it was light green, the color of spring. She smiled at the thought that just maybe somebody would find his or her future spouse at her wedding in the same way that she found hers.

With that thought in mind Tomoyo turned off the light and drifted away in slumber with a smile on her face.

The end.


End file.
